Questions and Answers (Spring 2022)
The following represents a select number of actual questions recently sent in to the ministry (lightly edited for brevity, clarity, and anonymity).
If you have a question you’d like to ask, feel free to send it in here: https://www.expositoryparenting.org/contact
Question: I’m a youth pastor who would love to see our ministry transition to more of a family-driven ministry that focuses more on equipping parents for discipling their kids. Do you know of any churches that are doing that well? Does Voddie Baucham or anyone else have any books out that clarify this model of ministry?
Answer: Thanks for reaching out and glad you're part of the ministry! This question is difficult to answer because, by and large, modern youth ministry is not really compatible with the kind of family-driven ministry that you're desiring. That’s not to say that youth ministry, in principle, is unbiblical. In fact, I do believe there is a warrant for ministering to various age groups, based on passages like Titus 2:4 and James 1:27. But in general, youth ministry typically supplants, rather than supplements, the God-ordained order in the home. So I would point you to Voddie’s book Family Driven Faith (https://www.voddiebaucham.org/product/family-driven-faith-paperback), and the NCFIC organization (https://churchandfamilylife.com), but would caution you in advance that this is probably not going to provide the answer you’re looking for. Taken to its logical conclusion, the kind of family-driven ministry you’re desiring would likely end the careers of virtually every “youth pastor” (I use the term here, though don’t accept its biblical warrant) in the U.S. With that said, I applaud your desire and if you can find a way to equip parents to be their child’s own “youth pastor,” it would be admirable! If you haven’t read Expository Parenting, consider checking it out and incorporating as much of it as you can into your philosophy of ministry.
Question: What’s the best translation to use with the Expository Parenting study guides?
Answer: The study guides (https://www.expositoryparenting.org/ntstudyguides) are all based on the NASB 95, which I believe to be the best translation in English—perhaps matched only by the recent LSB, which I haven’t investigated enough to say conclusively. Either way, any of the more formal equivalent translations (ESV, NKJV, et. al.) would assist with working through the study guides. As a general rule, I would avoid using dynamic equivalent translations like the NIV and NLT.
Question: Hey there! I loved the book. My husband travels a lot for work and listens to books while driving. Any plans for an Audible version of Expository Parenting?
Answer: Hi! Super glad to hear you found the book helpful. Unfortunately, I don’t have plans at this time to make an audio version, as the narration work is cost prohibitive. With that said, I do know that some people have apps on their phones that can take Kindle books and convert them to audio. I’ve never done it, but from what I understand it’s pretty common. That could be a good solution for your husband. Other than that, I guess I can only suggest that you tell him everything you’ve found helpful in it!
Question: I’m curious how you feel about homeschoolers playing on public school teams, or even how you feel about Christian schools. We’re struggling right now with a choice we made with our oldest. After moving, our only sports options are public or private, so we chose the private Christian school. But it hasn’t turned out well.
Answer: As far as playing on a public school team, I don't see anything in Scripture that would prohibit that, since sports are a categorically different experience than education (the latter is imparting a worldview, whereas the former is expressing a worldview... much like working for a pagan employer). And functionally, it wouldn’t be any different than playing on a “secular” travel sports team that’s unaffiliated with a particular school. With that said, however, know that many public schools require attendance, at least in part, from a homeschooler, at which point it a number of biblical principles would have to be compromised in order to accommodate the requirement. In terms of Christian schools, not only do I see them in alignment with biblical principles, but I actually think every local church should either host one, or partner with other churches in order to provide that opportunity. There are some people who want their kids to have a Christian education, but don’t have the ability to homeschool for a host of reasons. One common reason, for example, is in the case of a divorced couple, in which the non-Christian parent doesn’t want the Christian parent to homeschool, but would be ok with the child attending a private Christian school. Ultimately, we need to recognize that it’s not the biblical standard to outsource our child’s education to others, so homeschooling should be the primary route pursued by Christians, but a private school meets a vital need in the lives of many families who find themselves in difficulty. It also can provide a great option for sports participation.
Question: What does the Bible say about Christians relating to, and having a relationship with, people who a part of religious cults such as Mormons? For example, should a “Christian homeschool co-op” allow most of the teachers to be Mormon and use Mormon curriculum and material?
Answer: In principle, it sounds like you’re asking about the doctrine of biblical separation. Though there are only two classes of people in the world—those still “in Adam” (lost) and those “in Christ” (redeemed), there are other ways of categorizing and thinking about people as well. One example, as described at the end of the book of Jude, speaks of three classes: those who are still in the world (lost and in need of evangelism), those who are fellow believers in the church (saved and in need of ongoing discipleship), and those who are false teachers/converts in the church (unsaved and need to be exposed, disciplined, and potentially excommunicated). That final group would apply to all Christian cults such as Mormonism. Biblically, Christians should have no fellowship (meaning, participating in spiritual endeavors together) with such people, as they are not only lost and dead in their sins, but worse—claiming to know the truth of Christianity. For those who peddle a false Gospel, Paul would say “let them be accursed” (Gal. 1:8). These people are not only on the broad road, but they are actively leading others down it as well, and in the name of Christ. Certainly, we should treat all people with respect and kindness, thus we can recognize someone as a heretic while still treating them as a human. But in terms of homeschooling and co-ops, I would advise you to have nothing to do with a religious cult, whether Mormonism, Roman Catholicism, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Seventh Day Adventism, or any other false religion. After all, one of the primary reasons to homeschool, is to protect your kids from spiritually detrimental influences (just as a pastor is to protect his flock from wolves), and that protection should extend beyond just that of the secularism found in government schools.
Question: Hi. I just wanted to say thanks for writing an awesome book. I finished it last night. If you don’t mind, I do have a question though. I have an 11, 9, and 6 year old, and want to start going through the Bible. Do you have any recommendations on where to start? I'm leaning towards Mark, then Genesis...and then alternating NT/OT but I’m not 100% sure. I just know this is something that my family needs. Thank you!
Answer: That is great to hear, thanks for the feedback, and super encouraging to hear that it was helpful for you! As far as your situation goes, my first question would be whether or not you think your 6 year old is ready for verse-by-verse study with the older two. If so, great! That's ideal! If not, that's fine too, in which case you might want to consider using the Ergemeier Storybook Bible (https://www.amazon.com/Egermeiers-Bible-Story-Elsie-Egermeier/dp/1593173369) with him/her. Otherwise, if it were me, I’d start in Genesis and work through the whole Old Testament first. There is just too much foundational information necessary to properly understand the New Testament that would be missed otherwise. The other thing is that if you’re in an expositional church, your pastors will likely be teaching your kids from the New Testament every Sunday morning, which will help expedite the overall process (as explained in Expository Parenting), and will cover much of that portion for you. One final note is that though many portions of the Old Testament are daunting to many, I’ve been slowly providing teaching summaries and outlines that will equip you to carry out the task with confidence (https://www.expositoryparenting.org/otteachingoutlines). You can do it! So, in terms of a game plan, I’d pick up Ken Ham’s commentary (https://www.expositoryparenting.org/blog/2021/11/26), begin studying through Genesis, taking notes as needed (https://www.expositoryparenting.org/blog/2019/9/2), and then jump into Genesis 1:1 with your kids, aiming to teach through roughly one chapter at a time. For your own preparation, all you’d need to do is stay one chapter ahead of them, and you’ll be prepared! Praise God for preparing your heart for this work. It's not easy, but there is literally nothing better you could give your kids.
Question: Can you please explain to me what Calvinism is? I’m trying to understand it.
Answer: That is a great question! In short, Calvinism is just a shorthand term summarizing what the Bible teaches about salvation—how fallen people are made right with God. The acrostic TULIP is used to explain what Scripture teaches, as follows:
T: Total Depravity. Since the fall of Adam in the garden, all men are born under the curse of sin. We're fallen, sinful, depraved, and hating God from the moment we are conceived in the womb. Because our hearts are wicked, we don't seek for God anymore than a criminal would seek out the police. Instead, we're “totally depraved,” which doesn't mean that every person is as evil as he or she could possibly be, but rather, it means that every aspect of our being (mind, will, emotions, thoughts, words, actions, etc.) are all antagonistic toward God. We are born not only unable to look for righteousness, but unwilling to look for it. Furthermore, even the very best things that we do, apart from salvation, are tainted by sin and unacceptable in the eyes of God, because they stem from wrong motives. Think for example, of a man who commits murder and then sends the grieving victim’s family a sympathy card, and you’ll have an understanding of why our sin-stained lives cannot produce anything that pleases a holy God. (See 1 Cor. 2:14, Rom. 3:10-12, Eph. 2:1-3, Gen. 6:5, Jer. 13:23)
U: Unconditional Election. Because all of us are born sin-loving and God-hating, there is no one who seeks for God. No one is born desiring Jesus and His righteousness or forgiveness. Thus, left to ourselves, no one would be saved, because no one would ever repent. However, God, in order to demonstrate His mercy, decided in eternity past to save some individuals (these individuals are called "the elect"). He did not decide to save certain individuals because they were any better, wiser, or more righteous than anyone else. Nor did God “look into the future” to see who should or should no be saved. And He certainly doesn't leave salvation to “random chance” (as if that were possible). Rather, His decision was “unconditional,” meaning not based on anything in those whom He decided to save; His decision was strictly made according to His own plans and purposes for His creation. (See Rom. 9:15-16, Rom. 8:30, Eph. 1:4-5, Rev. 13:8)
L: Limited Atonement. In order to save those whom He chose to save, God sent His son Jesus to be a substitute for those elect people. Rather than those individuals having to pay for their own sins, God chose to send someone else—His perfect Son, to pay for their sins on the cross (which is the act of “atonement”). This was necessary for our salvation because God can't just “ignore” the sins of people and let them into heaven—that would be unjust for the same reason a judge can't just ignore the crimes of a criminal. Justice has to be satisfied. Thus, the good news of the Gospel is that Jesus came and satisfied God's justice by taking on the sins of these people, the elect, so that they would not have to pay for their own sins in hell forever. Of course, Jesus did not pay for the sins of every single individual; otherwise no one would have to pay for their own sins in hell. Hell would be empty. Instead, Jesus died for those who were chosen by the Father and given to Him for the purpose of saving. Thus Jesus' atoning death was "limited" in the sense that it was only for a group of people—the elect, who come to saving faith—not every individual who has ever lived. (See John 6:37, John 10:11, John 17:9, Matt. 20:28, Eph. 5:25, Matt. 1:21, Gal. 1:4)
I: Irresistible Grace. Because no sinner seeks for God (Total Depravity), God must instead seek sinners to save. Since we are all born with sinful hearts that run from God, God the Holy Spirit changes our hearts so that we do seek God. The Holy Spirit takes out our heart of stone (a heart that hates God and refuses to repent) and replaces it with a heart of flesh (a new heart that wants forgiveness, does repent, and trusts in Christ). Of course, God doesn't “ask for permission” to do this to those, nor does He wait around for the sinner’s heart to change or soften on its own (which would never happen). Instead, He causes people to be born again irresistibly. God overcomes the lost sinner's rebellion and changes his heart (being born again) so that the sinner can and will believe in Jesus. He subdues the hostile will of those whom He chooses and grants them the desire to repent and have faith in Christ, as well as the repentance and faith themselves, and He does so irresistibly—a sovereign demonstration of power and grace over His creatures that cannot be disrupted. (See John 1:12-13, 1 John 5:1, 2 Tim. 2:25, Acts 16:14, Jas. 1:18)
P: Perseverance of the Saints. Once a person comes to faith in Christ, the Holy Spirit will perfectly keep that individual trusting in Jesus such that it's impossible to “lose your salvation.” The Father chose whom to save, the Son died on the cross for those individuals, and the Holy Spirit sees to it that a true believer never stops believing in Christ. Of course, that doesn't mean that Christians are perfect, but it does mean that true Christians repent when they sin. Likewise, those who seem to “fall away from the faith” or turn their back on the Christianity they once professed, proved that they were never actually true Christians to begin with, because true Christians (“saints”) will persevere in the faith. They will never abandon Christ even in the midst of life’s difficulties—not because they are strong enough to hold onto Christ, but because Christ is strong enough to hold onto them. (See Phil. 1:6, 1 John 2:19, John 10:27-29, Rom. 8:30)
The reason these truths are called “Calvinism” is because it was John Calvin (and others) who helped recover and champion these truths back in the sixteenth century when most people had no idea they were being misled by the Roman Catholic Church. Of course, these first-generation Reformers did not call these doctrines “The Five Points of Calvinism” nor use the TULIP acrostic, but rather these doctrines were articulated together as such later in church history in response to errors that had plagued, and continue to plague, Protestantism, such as Arminianism and free-will theology.
Here is a great article explaining it as well: https://www.ligonier.org/learn/articles/what-tulip. Be blessed today!